The very first time I came to jail I was 11 years old and went to the detention home. I guess I felt lonely and regretful. I was in trauma that first time, but of course after that you don’t like coming to jail but you deal with it and get used to it.
My first time in county jail was very different. You see the real deal – people getting their heads split open and people kicking drugs; grown men crying on the phone to their loved ones saying, “I promise I’ll never do that again”. I tripped out when I saw that people would keep food in their boxes and save meals overnight. But after a while you get used to these things.
My first time going away for a while was an experience also. I was away for 19 months and by the time I got home I had learned to enjoy little things a lot more. But it seems that after 2-6 months of being free we all forget the lashes we took and start taking advantage of life again.
The First Time I was Told I was Going to be a Daddy by Lawrence Cuellar
It was Thanksgiving weekend. My then girlfriend and I were lounging around the apartment. I had noticed that since Thanksgiving Day she was acting completely different than usual, so I finally confronted her. Her response was something that I was not ready for. She looked me right in my eyes and said, “We are going to be expecting a baby!” My reply was almost like what every man would say. “Well, how did that happen?” I said, as she stood there with teary eyes. I knew that she was thinking that I would not stay and take care of my responsibilities. But, that would be furthest from what I was actually thinking. I was an emotional rollercoaster. First was shock, then came joy, and not to mention panic, all of which were bouncing around my head. When I finally calmed down, I hugged and kissed her and told her that we had nothing to worry about.I would love her and our new baby, take care of them and support us as a family. It was the most joyous time in my life; to know I was going to become a Daddy, and now 17 years later I can honestly say that I kept my word as a man, and now I would say it was my honor to raise my daughter, not my responsibility.
